Happy Relationship at MOVE! and meeting bullying with compassion

Last Sunday, I had the honor of being interviewed at the MOVE! conference, the second in a series of workshops for creative women who want to make their ideas into a movement presented by The Skool founder Jose Caballer and co-host Tatjana Luethi. The first event was MERGE!, where we identified our passions and were given tools as how to merge them into our profession. Both events were sold out and the energy high. The inspiration I received from so many amazing women was phenomenal. The event was filmed and as soon as I get the footage, I will add my segment here. But until then, I’ll share one of the highlights I touched upon.

At MERGE!, I met Melinda Hsu Taylor, a screenwriter (Lost, Medium, etc.) who wanted to create a workshop for children to teach compassion. This resonnated with me, so I immediately set a meeting with her to explore our passions. Out came the “Learn Compassion through Play” workshop that we pitched to the Goethe International Charter School in Culver City. The school introduced us to Christiane Wolf, MD and Mindfulness Coach, who jumped on board to round out our team. The principal and teachers loved our presentation. We are now waiting on a June 18 vote from their Advisory Council to give us the green light. Fingers crossed!

The focus of the compassion workshop for the 5th graders, the first group that will engage with us, is addressing the cause of bullying. It all starts with a child not being heard. When this basic need is not met, anger starts to build, followed by low self esteem for being invisible. As this accelerates in the child, a way to alleviate the pain is to find someone who will notice them, giving them a sense of power and visibility. A shy or withdrawn child is the preferred target since the chance of retaliation is low. Addressing this cause of not being heard gives the bully the opportunity to express their feelings in a safe setting which can be the beginning of their healing process. Using the Origami Edition of The Secret of a Happy Relationship moderated by our team, teachers, and volunteer parents, we hope to make a difference in these children’s lives and create a model for additional workshops being held nationally in our schools. We are speaking with documentary filmmakers and funders to record this process and spread the message of teaching compassion effectively to our children.

Now back to MOVE!  When I mentioned this program as one of the many avenues we are taking with The Secret of a Happy Relationship, a counselor from another LA area charter school and MOVE! attendee that day, voiced her interest in bringing our workshop to her school. A life coach also approached us with interest in using The Secret of a Happy Relationship with her clients. And a leader in the Nonviolent Communication (NVC) community asked if we’d give a workshop at their conference.  WOW!  I can’t say enough about the awesome women that have attended MERGE! and MOVE! who are collaborating with us to extol the benefits of our communication tool.

Let us know your thoughts and how we can create happiness in your neighborhood.

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Family Dad

A few days ago, we launched this site. But The Secret of a Happy Relationship™ has been around since 2001, way before social media was as accessible as it is today. We are now reaching out to the lucky people who have been using this effective communication tool for the last few years and asking them to share their experiences. So please check back, get a guide for yourself, and join the community of happy people whose relationships have improved by their commitment to making the world a happier place, two people at a time.

In the meantime, please ask any questions or give us suggestions on how we can make this site and community a great place to visit.

When I first played the game, I did it with my dad. I used the Family Edition which has the cool feature of being able to customized the boxes with the images of the person you are playing with. My favorite picture of my dad was one from his college days when he was in his 20′s. Isn’t he a handsome guy? This process with him created a dialog that we never had before. My dad was rather shy and getting him to talk about his feeling wasn’t easy. But when we used The Secret of a Happy Relationship™ as the vehicle for conversation, he opened up to me and we had the most amazing talks. My dad was big on following rules. And since this guide had a few rules to follow, he followed them to the tee! I was amazed at how much he had to share. I guess some people need a structure to open up and I am so glad to have found this one for us. I wish we would have had this process when I was growing up. I can only image how rich our conversations would have been. But I am grateful for the time we did have opening our hearts to each other.